A new way to converse with God

   Write it down 

 

    Okay so I was having trouble really getting the jest of talking to God and a friend I made through God by the way, she has always been very religious so I love talking to her about things, she really helps put everything in perspective and keeps me going in my time of thinking "is this really happening or am I going off my rocker". Funny thing is though, she hears God to in her own way, and EVERY TIME God tells me something and I'm like nope not listening I'm going crazy this just isn't happening to me. I start talking to her and she ALWAYS says the same exact thing God just told me. So it has to be happening right? How would she know what He is telling me, unless He is speaking to her as well.

 

     And let me say the reason I think I'm crazy sometimes (and right now I have come to better terms with it so I don't think I'm as crazy any more ha) is because I had a horrible past. I did things I'm not proud of and I thought God might love me but why would He want to talk to me, or why would He choose some one like me, with the past that I had to talk to or ask me to give messages and spread His word.

 

     Its because I had that strength to fight back, I had the strength to say no I'm not going to let the devil win and I want to change my life. I turned to God and asked Him to help me and He looked in my heart and saw how badly I wanted a change and by His grace He gave me a second change to live my life right. To live it for Him.

 

     ~So my friend suggested to write in a special note book just things I want to say or ask God and sit and listen to see what I hear or what comes to me. It works, but it works better when I'm painting or doing anything that soothes me. It's hard for me to sit in complete quiet when I have two wild things running all over the house ha ha. But I carry my little note book around now and keep it open so when He tells me something I write it down. I love it, I love putting God's words down on paper and then when I'm having my lost moment I can reach for my book and read the words He tells me and it makes it better.

 

 

 

My Status Update

 

April 23rd

 

    Let me acknowledge that YES I know when I say something about God, or when I say He talks to me, I DO realize that I sound completely crazy, No I don't always hear His voice, yes sometimes I do. NO I WILL NOT ALWAYS HAVE THESE CRAZY POSTS, I only speak about Him, bc like a woodpecker, He pecks at me till it comes off my chest. Right now I converse a lot with Him back and forth because I think I am really coming to terms with what I'm suppose to be doing. Believe me at the beginning of the day I was sitting on the floor in my kitchen because I just couldn't grasp everything that was going on and I felt like I was drowning. I even tried to leave my house and I ended up right back here and He pretty much made it known that I cant hide from Him (as if I thought I could) But God assured me that it was okay I needed to get up and keep going. I know a lot of people don't understand but here's the deal NEITHER DO I.. But I will share with you what I have learned today.:

Why Me? Do you know the bad things I have done? Is the question I have BEEN asking and today here's what I got:
I chose Paul why not you?

You danced with the Devil and had the strength to fight back.

I chose you because of your heart.

Give yourself more credit than you think you deserve.

No body is hopeless,

I have ALWAYS loved you through your mistakes.

Your power is greater than you know.

It is okay to be scared, but you shouldn't be.

I am always with everyone, those who give in will hear me.
 

Okay so I kinda got it, I asked God for help a long time ago, recently I just gave up and said alright take control.

Bigger things I have learned today, and here's what everyone needs to pay attention to:
"Some days I won't talk at all, Some days I will just listen"

"Don't think your invincible just because I am with you, It doesn't work like that"

" Learn to have patience, I can't just give it to you, it would be like cheating on a test. And I will test you."

"I can see everything you do, so don't do anything you don't want me to see".

So as I converse I write it down, Because when I start to feel bad and I think I'm crazy and I really want to curl up in a ball and cry, I pull out my book and I look at the words He's telling me. (Thank you Jami for telling me about this method) NO He is not always going to talk to me, NO He's not just going to give me the answers. But He loves me He's always loved me through the bad choices and the hard times. I just wasn't ready to give in, and when I felt like all was hopeless and it couldn't get any worse (and yes it could always be worse), I did what I needed to do for MYSELF, My Husband and my Children, and well this was the end result. A relationship that is giving me complete happiness. Its okay to think I'm crazy, I wont be offended, we are only human after all. I just felt like I needed people to understand NO I DON'T THINK I'M BETTER THAN ANYONE, I'm just trying to help people realize that everyone needs God in their life whether you want to admit it or not, and YES He wants you to be this close to Him. And I didn't just randomly start getting this close to God, A LOT of events in my life have led me to this point.
~ Also in His own way God told me it was time to cool my jets and just listen and learn. So NO there will not always be a crazy novel I'm going to post on face book, I do have regular life LOL.